Show me someone who is successful in business and in life and nine times out of ten, that person–even if they are a self-made success–had positive influencers in their life. Whether you’re a journalist, an engineer, a politician, or an entrepreneur, there were people who cheered you on and helped steer you on the right path.
I was lucky enough to have some amazing mentors early on in my life. One person in particular not only encouraged me to pursue an entrepreneurial path, but he also gave me some critical tools I needed to succeed. He was a local businessman who made me his gofer. Starting at the age of fourteen, I helped him with small tasks and he took me under his wing.
This mentor taught me about the working world and exposed me to a different way of thinking. I wound up with a wealth of knowledge about small business ownership and management, manufacturing, entrepreneurship, and professional relationships. Having this rarefied glimpse into the business world demystified “adulting” and allowed me to see a path forward for myself.
I want to talk about what mentoring is, as well as the importance of learning and giving back on the road to success in whatever path you happen to choose.
What is Mentoring: Hint, It Is NOT Transactional!
So many interactions in business are transactional, but the first thing you need to know about mentoring is that it is absolutely NOT transactional.
According to Reena Gupta and Rebecca Cullen, authors of Career Interrupted, mentoring is about creating a human connection–a reciprocal relationship. “You should never enter any mentoring relationship without thinking about what you have to offer, even if it is just respect and gratitude.”
A good mentor inspires, pushes you to break barriers, develop your interests, and expand your worldview in an encouraging, judgment-free zone. It can be a family member, a friend, a colleague, or someone you greatly admire who you’d like to get to know.
Mentorship in the work world is a dynamic relationship where someone more experienced provides guidance, support, and knowledge to someone starting out. Your mentor has blazed a trail by trial and error and undoubtedly has wisdom to share about the potential pitfalls in your career path and how you might avoid them.
When I was making my way into the entrepreneurial world, I always wanted to be around people who were smart and had an interesting perspective to share. I knew that people who had been there and done that would also help me get there too.
All In the Family
If you’re lucky enough to have a nurturing family, they can be some of the most impactful, encouraging mentors in your life.
Family–whether it’s a parent, sibling, uncle, or cousin–can help young people navigate reading, writing, and managing a workload. They can answer questions you didn’t get to (or were afraid to) ask at school, provide a broader context, and give you life experiences that simply can’t be taught in a classroom.
For kids who need a little extra support in their lives, The Big Brother/Big Sister program is an excellent way for someone to get involved in a young person’s life. Big Brothers/Sisters expose kids to things they may not have access to, whether it’s kayaking or hiking out in nature, going to the theatre, or just getting help and encouragement with schoolwork.
It’s a one-year commitment in which the mentor spends two to three hours a week with their mentee. Sometimes, just the fact that you’ve dedicated part of your busy schedule to spending time with a young person is an incredibly positive thing in their life.
Life skills
As a mentor, you in turn can pay back the mentoring you received in your life by helping young people in your world, offering them encouragement to try new things and even fail sometimes. If young people are encouraged to keep going after one thing doesn’t work out, they realize they can try a different way, at the same time understanding that their world didn’t fall apart when they failed.
In fact, instilling in kids that failure is part of learning can be a gift that will help them throughout their lives, no matter what career path they decide to go down.
Other life skills such as organization, budgeting, and prioritizing your health and nutrition are things you can teach at home. Family and community mentors can help young people navigate relationships, learn communication skills, and build confidence and self-esteem.
Measuring the Impact of Mentoring
According to one workplace happiness survey, nine out of ten employees with a career mentor feel happy at work. They’re more likely to report being well compensated and to feel like their contributions are recognized—important factors in overall job satisfaction.
Mentorship is a powerful tool for accelerating career growth. When you’re mentored, you receive valuable constructive criticism and targeted feedback. The personalized coaching provided by experienced mentors helps you develop critical skills and business acumen.
This focused development can definitely boost career advancement. In fact, a 2020 survey revealed that individuals who had access to mentorship were five times more likely to receive promotions than those without mentors!
For those who have ambitious career plans, this statistic really drives home the importance of actively seeking and nurturing mentor relationships to fast-track your professional success.
How To Find a Mentor
Be proactive
It’s undeniable that the business world can be an intimidating, competitive place, but everyone who is successful has to start somewhere, right? You’d be surprised how many successful people are humbled and gratified when younger people coming up look up to them and ask them for advice.
The best way to approach someone you want to learn from is, first of all, by simply letting them know you admire them.
Don’t be random: Be specific
When you approach a busy professional about wanting to learn from them, don’t be vague–be specific. Let them know your goals. If you choose an approach such as, “Hey, maybe we can get coffee sometime and I can pick your brain,” chances are they’re not going to be incentivized to fit you into their schedule.
But if you approach them with specificity about your goals and some roadblocks you’re encountering, or areas you’d like to expand into but you’re unsure how they will probably be honored to give you some guidance in your career path.
This strategy works in any number of arenas. For example, if you’re writing a book, think about people in your circle who have written books. Would one of them be willing to sit down with you to give you some tips about how to approach the process of getting started?
If you’re in sales but you really love marketing and you’re wondering how you can collaborate with someone from the marketing department, share your ideas and perhaps there’s a synergistic way you can collaborate.
Similarly, if you’re considering a career pivot and there’s someone who’s doing great things in the field you’re trying to break into, reach out and get in touch with them. Ask them how they got started in that line of work. Ask them if they have any transitioning advice about how you can upskill or immerse yourself in experiences that will help you break into that arena.
No matter what you’re setting out to achieve, people have gone there before you. Chances are there are people you know, or people you can reach out to who you might not know that well who are more than happy to have coffee with you or even take you under their wing and help give you career advice.
But if you’re not proactive and you’re too afraid to reach out for mentoring, you’re missing out on an investment in yourself that could pay off in huge dividends in the long run.
No One is an Island
Though I was lucky early on with a great mentor, there were times in my entrepreneurial journey when I should have sought out mentors but I didn’t.
One of my startups failed because I thought I could do everything by myself. I was so focused on profitability that I didn’t seek out the people to support the mission, vision, and values. The lesson I learned is that true success comes from surrounding yourself with people who have more expertise in specific areas than you and seeking their advice.
The Two-Way Street of Mentorship
One of the things that I love the most about mentoring is learning from my mentees. After all, part of being a lifelong learner is opening yourself up to new experiences and new voices. So for me, sharing perspectives is a two-way street.
Young people just starting out have insights I might not necessarily have. And in the fast-paced world of business, sometimes the mentor’s knowledge and techniques can be outdated. They may need to be updated, or even unlearned.
Mentees can provide a fresh way of addressing old problems. And when it comes to technology, we all know that digital natives are faster, savvy adopters who can probably all teach us a thing or two to help us be more productive with our time.
As for myself, I’m a lifelong learner, and I respect and admire anyone who shares that thirst for knowledge and experience. I absolutely love when people approach me to ask me for advice. I’m humbled and happy to give it.
Look For Mentors at Every Stage of Your Life
Finally, I would say that the lessons you need to learn at twenty-one are not the same lessons you need to learn at thirty-five, or fifty. Seek out mentors who are not only good at work, but also good at life. Yes, I’m talking about the delicate work/life balance that we hear so much about.
And remember, your community involvement and the work that you do on your own personal development will carry you through every challenge that you face. Your goals will change as you age, and it’s important to be in touch with what you want and why you want it.
Now I plan for what I want by taking time away from the business and creating a little space to reflect on what I want to achieve in the big picture. For that wisdom, I credit a great friend and mentor of mine who taught me “timeline therapy,” which allows me to close my eyes and visit a future version of myself that achieved whatever I wish to achieve.
Embrace the journey of personal and professional growth by actively seeking out mentors and nurturing supportive relationships. Remember, no one achieves success alone—your network is your greatest asset.
